A Culture of Unreality

 Our social milieu is delusional in so many ways, largely by design. Yet the toxic seepage from Bizarro World Academia into social media, schools, government, non-profit orgs, and overall culture cannot be overstated. People under 20 are probably the most influenced, but so are those in their 20s, 30s, 40s, and up.

If social media is any indication, what these cohorts have in common is an apparent total disconnect from nature, and from reality overall. They can’t tell the difference between fact and opinion. They’ve never learned to watch or question their own thoughts, thereby learning that much of what they think is fleeting and unreal. They never learned critical thinking or to challenge themselves.

They don’t have problem-solving skills because most of these coddled children never had to solve any. Someone always rushed in to do that for them. They didn’t get free play, especially outside, with kids of their own choosing. Unlike the baby boomer cohort, they never got to decide what to do with other kids, like make up games and the rules for those games, and together solve the problems that arose, or learn how to deal with the problematic kids. In person, face to face.

They didn’t build forts together with found materials, or play in the woods, pretending to be explorers or pioneers or Native Americans (all of which would now be considered very BAD, a violation of critical social justice theories and therefore akin to VIOLENCE). Besides, what woods in towns are even left now?

These kids played in adult-organized sports league teams, and in some cases there was no winning team or losing team, so the kids didn’t learn how to deal with disappointment and loss, or develop the qualities of good sportsmanship and behaving with dignity when things didn’t go your way.

So their earliest years, a critical time for free play and exploration, was given over to parent-arranged activities, with frequent adult input, and adult-selected playmates, adult-imposed solutions.

 These people as parents seem to have little if any grasp of developmental psychology or biology. They don’t seem to get how the imagination is a huge feature of early childhood, or the fact that the child’s brain is still actively forming and developing, and it will be years before they are capable of adult-level thinking. Years before the frontal cortex is finished at age 23-25.

There’s a reason children are not allowed to make their own legal and medical decisions. Why they’re not allowed to vote, operate complex machinery, or drive, even if they could do so without being able to reach the pedals.

When young children announce “I’m a horse”! Or "I'm Superman"! It doesn’t mean they’re expressing a wish to be implemented permanently for the rest of their lives, and for which they have no ability to even begin to comprehend what that means.

It’s NORMAL for young children to pretend they are someone they are not – it’s a key feature of the young child’s development. A little boy announcing he’s a girl, or Wonder Woman, or some other female, a little girl pretending she’s a boy because she likes to play with the cool “boy” stuff, is a normal developmental event. It does NOT mean the child is “trans”, or was “born in the wrong body.”

And what is the agenda of those asserting such nonsense, and hiding behind their professional titles to do so? Attention? Funding? Peer approval? Or something more insidious?

The acolytes of this cult of gender woo have wormed their way into every level of public life, especially public schools. The NGOs promoting this unproven theory have an open door to present this ludicrous storyline from the preschool level on up. They are misleading children, and confusing children with concepts that are beyond their ability to evaluate and question.

Young children generally believe adults without question, or try to, to the best of their abilities. Hence the push from these acolytes to access the youngest children possible.

Gender ideology, while claiming to support people “being who they are”, is in fact based on the oldest and most tired sex-based stereotypes of human behavior: Blue is for boys, pink is for girls. Toy trucks and tractors are for boys. Dolls and easy-bake ovens are for girls. Boys like building things. Girls like pretending to be mothers. Boys are strong and aggressive. Girls like to look pretty and cheer them on. And some of that can be seen in children’s play, but what seems to be ignored are all the kids who also like to play and pretend things outside these limited stereotypes.

But according to gender ideologists, any child not conforming to these limited, rigid sex-based stereotypes is possibly someone who should be evaluated for social “transition” as soon as possible. And of course what follows THAT? Medical transition, with puberty blockers, wrong-sex hormones for life (and the attendant serious side effects, sterility, and inability to ever orgasm), and/or surgery. 

This. Is. Nuts.

When Both Left and Right Sound Loony: Lots of Unanswered Questions

Yes, right wing extremists have a very well-funded platform and a disturbing agenda. The disturbing agenda part feels strangely familiar.

I think it would be refreshing if a major left-leaning site finally acknowledged the left's social/political agenda; specifically,  its ambitious attempts to insert gender ideology, queer theory, and critical race theories into schools, government agencies, non-profits, and just about everywhere else. They've already taken over social media, universities, and completely captured the democratic party - yet not a word about that is ever uttered by the mouthpieces of what passes for the left these days. Perhaps they're terrified of their own readers: Some are likely the same vitriolic, misogynist, and sanctimonious arbiters of cultural correctness we're inundated with on social media.

This may come as a surprise to some, because those of us who do not embrace these unsupported post-modern social theories have largely been de-platformed and demonized as "bigots" by the politically righteous on social media platforms. Which is a tad ironic coming from the compulsive virtue signalers who now vilify an entire race of people, but irony sails over many heads these days, on either side of the political spectrum.

Unfortunately, the "critical" part of critical social justice apparently does not include "critical thinking", which is now a foreign concept to Americans in general, whether left or right. While I never was part of the latter, I no longer fit into the former. And I'm far from the only one.

The hate and intolerance of the left, aimed at anyone who doesn't embrace their unsupported theories or "affirm" biological impossibilities, is just as big of a threat to our country/culture as the hate and intolerance of the right. 

 

And the promotion of  divisive social theories  - who is benefiting from the mindset of dividing people, of keeping conflict front and center? From insisting that literally everything has to do with race, and that an entire race - white people - are born bigots? From conflating the teaching of an accurate history with critical race theory, which are separate issues? From viewing absolutely everyone and everything through the binary lens of "oppressor and victim"? From the assertion that heterosexuality and "normalcy" is somehow bad, or at the very least, not appealing? Who benefits from insisting everyone pretend that humans can actually change their biological sex by wishing it so, along with lifelong cross-sex hormones plus surgery?  Or for that matter, the ludicrous notion that a person's biological sex is "assigned at birth"?

 

 Who is benefiting from telling children - little kids, ffs - that "they may have been born into the wrong bodies" if their interests and play choices don't conform to rigid, regressive sex-based stereotypes?  It's almost like there's an entire industry seeking to create a generation of lifelong medical patients. Oh wait...

 What happened to the sex-based rights and protection of actual women? Why are women called names and even physically attacked BY THOSE ON THE LEFT, for fighting for their own domains like locker rooms, changing rooms, sports teams, shelters, bathrooms, and even jail cells?  Why is the comfort and safety of women not an issue, and how is it that leftist women themselves center the wishes/delusions of a tiny minority of males over women's needs and wants? These self-described progressive women seem so pathetically desperate to position themselves as kind and inclusive, yet can't be bothered to include actual women in their consideration. This is apparently what passes for "feminism" these days on the left.

And why are the LGBTQ alphabet groups ignoring the homophobia promoted by gender ideology? Could it be because LGBTQ etc is now in reality TTTQ? (All trans all the time, with a dash of "queer" thrown in for that extra edginess). Lesbians are now not allowed to have women-only gatherings, dating sites, or clubs, because that would be "transphobic" to not include the men who pretend they are women. Seriously? Hel-looooo....what part of "same sex attraction" do the gender acolytes not get?!

 

Why aren't these kinds of questions ever addressed, or even asked, in the media? Why is no one on the so-called left allowed to discuss any of this without being utterly vilified? What does it tell you when even the most insightful, articulate writers with media platforms avoid these questions and issues like the plague?  Shouldn't that be seen as at least problematic?

Individuals like me, who have never had an affinity for the right, who also aren't centrists, and now can't relate to much of the left, are politically and socially homeless.

 

It feels strange and alienating. When listening to many progressives now, I find myself thinking the same thoughts I'd have when listening to MAGA folks: "How can you actually believe stuff like this?!"

A Scenario:

 Imagine that there is something you need to stay  alive and there are two methods to obtain it.

 

A)  If you choose method 1, you will live but many 

       others will suffer and die.

 

B)  If you choose method 2, you will live and                     

      nobody else will suffer or die.

 

 Do you Choose method 1 or method 2?

                     Congratulations.

      You now understand veganism.

Eclipses, Awareness, Relating, and Other Ideas

Yesterday in WNC it cleared up nicely, so I was able to see the part of the solar eclipse that was visible here. (Fortunately, I’d saved the viewing glasses from the last solar eclipse). I watched it for almost two hours, and once again this amazing universe did not disappoint. What a fascinating event to see!

Astrologer Jamie Partridge from the UK says that: “The New Moon in Libra on October 14, 2023, is an annular solar eclipse. It makes a quincunx aspect to Uranus. So, the meaning of the New Moon October 2023 astrology is to solve problems by using imagination and open-mindedness to overcome polarized thinking.” He says that this solar eclipse “aligns with stars that support the quest for solutions through leadership, diplomacy and the ability to see things from both sides.”

Sounds like things that are badly needed everywhere in this world right now.

But whether or not the symbolism of astrology has any meaning or relevance to you, in my humble opinion there is never a bad time for expanded views, and seeing more clearly into "my blind spots, the places where I thoroughly believe the stuff that goes through my head, the unexamined nonsense that runs great portions of my life.”  (Quote is from Cheri Huber, Zen teacher and guide).

Cheri is talking about the practice of passive awareness, or awareness without a goal, which means simply getting present, "being aware without judgement, without recrimination or rationalization, of the world we’ve created in our minds. Without making yourself wrong or bad, and without trying to change.”

She writes that “with this system (the conditioning we all have), I am operating in a world of delusion…. That orientation will be altered only by an internal process. We call that process awareness practice or self-discovery.”

“I begin to drop habitual patterns of suffering and delusion, and I spend more time here in the present, in a place of clarity, seeing how I maintain suffering, and letting it go. From that place I am different.”

She adds that struggling to change strengthens what you are trying to change.

In terms of relationships, she says “In intimate relationship, at the beginning we can usually see our partner’s purity and innocence because we are open and undefended with each other. (Projection again. Those qualities in ourselves are being reflected in the partner). Then, just as in childhood when we start receiving the blows, the disappointments, the hurts, we start to close off…"

"But as adults, if we can go beyond our conditioning, stay open-hearted, and not put up defenses, if we can continue to see the other person from that original, innocent, pure place, we have the opportunity to heal much injury and suffering.”

Yes, love involves the task of opening our heart, and keeping it open, which often feels challenging to the ego and makes us feel too vulnerable, especially when discord arises. That’s when it’s helpful to remember that we all come with conditioning, baggage, trauma, insecurities, and that none of us are at our best all the time, with loved ones or anyone else. No matter how much we may want to be.

It's taken me a long time to really get that when you can learn to have compassion for yourself, your mistakes, your wounds, your messed up thinking, and the pain you’ve endured and caused, then it’s much easier to find compassion and understanding for those things in others.

Marianne Williamson, in “Every Day Grace” says that “The key to right relationship…is to allow each one, in every moment, to be lifted from the past. A relationship is reborn whenever we see someone as they are right now and don’t hold them to what they were. Focus on the present, not the past, is essential to the experience of grace.”

Williamson believes relationships have a spiritual purpose, and “bring together those who represent the greatest opportunities for learning from each other. In every relationship there’s an endless stream of potential healing.” Of course, whether that potential happens, or the relationship is undermined by grievance and ego, is up to us.  “The light in our own mind will help dissolve the darkness in someone else’s, but only if we refuse to judge or blame them for what we view as their errors.”

She goes on to write that “the walls (that divide us) primarily live in our own minds.” And our higher selves have the power to dissolve them. “Everyone makes mistakes; we all have bad days, get in rotten moods, and say or do things we wish we hadn’t. We would be much better off – and certainly our relationships would improve – were we to take every moment’s word and deed less seriously and to trust in the deeper intentions of the heart.”

David Richo, who wrote “The Five Things We Cannot Change”, notes in the section “People Are Not Loving and Loyal All the Time”, that “The purpose of relationships is the same as the purpose of our work and life: To become fully evolved adults who give and receive the 5 A’s abundantly: attention, acceptance, appreciation, affection, and allowing. Anything less leads to a stunting of ourselves.”

Later in the section he talks about being aware of our partner’s negative traits with compassion, and suggests asking ourselves, “Am I willing to play on relationship’s full checkerboard of light and dark?”

 An article in The Marginalian about Thicht Nat Hahn’s book “How to Love” summarizes his urging for us to really listen to each other, because that’s the prerequisite for true understanding in a love or any other relationship:

”Echoing legendary Zen teacher D.T. Suzuki’s memorable aphorism that “the ego-shell in which we live is the hardest thing to outgrow,” Nhat Hanh considers how the notion of the separate, egoic “I” interrupts the dialogic flow of understanding — the “interbeing,” to use his wonderfully poetic and wonderfully precise term, that is love:

“Often, when we say, “I love you” we focus mostly on the idea of the “I” who is doing the loving and less on the quality of the love that’s being offered. This is because we are caught by the idea of self. We think we have a self. But there is no such thing as an individual separate self. A flower is made only of non-flower elements, such as chlorophyll, sunlight, and water. If we were to remove all the non-flower elements from the flower, there would be no flower left. A flower cannot be by herself alone. A flower can only inter-be with all of us… Humans are like this too. We can’t exist by ourselves alone. We can only inter-be. I am made only of non-me elements, such as the Earth, the sun, parents, and ancestors. In a relationship, if you can see the nature of interbeing between you and the other person, you can see that his suffering is your own suffering, and your happiness is his own happiness. With this way of seeing, you speak and act differently. This in itself can relieve so much suffering.”

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

More thoughts on relating from Thich Nhat Hanh:

“When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change.”

“The source of love is deep in us and we can help others realize a lot of happiness. One word, one action, one thought can reduce another person’s suffering and bring that person joy.”

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That’s the message he is sending.”

“People deal too much with the negative, with what is wrong. Why not try and see positive things, to just touch those things and make them bloom?”